Retrograde Waters

Hello. I'm Rose, 20-something Nebraskan. If you want to know more feel free to ask, I'm not going to waste space here.
This is a personal blog that serves as a miscellaneous collection of things I find cute, cool, interesting, and enraging.
I know that all people are equal and deserve the same rights and respect, and I welcome everyone of all and any race, religion, nationality, gender, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity and expression, romantic orientation, age, ability, anything else I may have forgotten (let me know!) and any combination or absence thereof. I do NOT welcome discrimination and bigotry. If *I* say or do anything that is offensive or insensitive, please tell me! I try to consider everyone/different perspectives and experiences when speaking, but I could always make a mistake, and educating myself is a constant process: I will be grateful rather than offended to have small-mindedness on my part pointed out. It's the only way I'll know to correct it.
Thank you and have a nice day!
(Blog NSFW: strong language, various topics of discussion, and occasional images of anatomy and/or nudity.)
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Posts tagged "rape"


Literally like the only way most men can think of a woman as a person who shouldn’t be raped and abused is by thinking of her as “someone’s daughter”, “someone’s wife”, “someone’s sister”, etc. They can’t just think of her as a woman unto herself who SHOULD NOT BE RAPED WHETHER OR NOT SHE IS A SINGLE ORPHANED ONLY CHILD, that would be weird. She must belong or be connected to someone in some way in order to be a person worthy of respect.

(via thatfeministqueer2-deactivated2)







In other words….he raped her.

In other words…he raped her to assert dominance over her and objectify her and treat her like his possession. 

“forcefully had sex”

Ugh, fuck that sugar-coated language.  Nobody will call it rape because it’s Elvis Presley, but…it’s rape.  According to this, Elvis was a rapist.  Cope however you fucking want in hearing this, but don’t sugar-coat what happened.

Because in initiating sex with someone, no force should be used.  I don’t mean the actual sexual practices, but initiating it.  Getting consent.  if they meant they had rough sex, the wording would have reflected that no problem.  There also isn’t any “force” used in rough sex either, if it’s consensual.  But “forcefully had sex” is clearly weasel language.

One time this woman in a bar called him a “son of a bitch,” so he threw a pool cue at her and damaged her breast, she had to go to the hospital and have surgery to repair it.

This book is where I get my information. It’s been many years since I read it, I don’t remember all the shitty details, but I remember that one.

In addition to being sexist, he was racist and homophobic as well.

Priscilla’s autobiography is probably where the most of that wikipedia section comes from. And yes, he did rape her. She makes that very clear. (Read that one too, those years ago, while I was an Elvis fan. These two books managed to cure me of that.)

Also Priscilla was very young when she met him. I forget…14, I see, wikipedia has listed. 

(via nextmorgothidol)


Being nice or not nice has nothing to do with your actions. You need consent before you engage in sexual activity with anyone—including people you are in a relationship with. 

Not raping or taking the risk of raping the three women I mentioned here doesn’t make me “nice.” It just makes me a responsible person—toward myself and other people. But if you read the Good Men Project’s articles and others like them, you might think differently because they poorly attempt to present you with other “in-between” types of men, beyond the responsible and the criminal:

The “Accidental Rapist” who had sex with a sleeping woman because she looked like she wanted to have sex with him when she was awake. The “Occupational Hazard Rapist,” who has sex with drunk women, some of whom might call him to tell him he raped him, but whatevs. Beyond these, there are other types of rapists I’ve heard of and you probably have, too. The “No-Contest Rapist” is still a “nice guy” because the woman was too traumatized to stop him. The “She-Was-Asking-For-It Rapist” can’t seem to view women as human beings who have a purpose in life other than getting men to sleep with them. For the “We’re-in-a-Sexual-Relationship-So-I-Don’t-Need-Consent Rapist,” Google “spousal rape.” There are lots more. And guess what? Most of these guys are “nice guys,” not monsters, we’re told.

By using sympathetic narratives and then peppering them with how the woman dressed, how she bragged about her sex life—so unladylike, right?—and how she kissed him on the lips, looked at him a certain way, touched him on the thigh, the pieces published by the Good Men Project weave utterly confusing scenarios. Then, with their liberal use of clichés, dehumanizing characterizations of women, and misrepresenting criminality, they are playing mind games with their readers to make the facts murky and advocate that these men are “nice guys.”

Read all of this excellent piece here.

(via fuckyeahsexeducation)


Railway blocked between Toronto and Montreal.

A  native woman raped and beaten in Thunder Bay in what is being reported as a hate crime.

Earlier, someone threatened all the institutions at Kahnawake, saying he’d shoot any protesting natives.

Things are escalating, please be careful.

(via golden-zephyr-deactivated201401)



A 17-year-old Indian girl who was gang-raped killed herself after police pressured her to drop the case and marry one of her attackers, police and a relative said on Thursday.

Amid the ongoing uproar over the gang-rape of a student on a bus in New Delhi earlier this month, the latest case has again shone the spotlight on the police’s handling of sex crimes.

One police officer has been sacked and another suspended over their conduct after the assault during the festival of Diwali on November 13 in the Patiala region in the Punjab, according to officials.

The teenager was found dead on Wednesday night after swallowing poison.

Her death came as it emerged that the names, addresses and photographs of convicted rapists will be posted online by police in India to publicly shame them for their crimes.

Inspector General Paramjit Singh Gill said that the teenager had been “running from pillar to post to get her case registered” but officers failed to open a formal inquiry.

“One of the officers tried to convince her to withdraw the case,” Gill, the police chief for the area, told AFP.

Before her death, there had been no arrests over her case although three people were detained on Thursday. Two of them were her alleged male attackers and the third was a suspected woman accomplice.

The victim’s sister told Indian television that the teenager had been urged to either accept a cash settlement or marry one of her attackers.

“The police started pressuring her to either reach a financial settlement with her attackers or marry one of them,” her sister told the NDTV network.

no words :( 

patriarchy is killiing our people 


(via commodifiedsouls)




tw: abuse, rape, domestic violence


A few weeks ago my mom stapled pages of a story in one of her women’s magazines together and handed it to me. She gave it to me pretty much with the tag lines “for your feminist blog” and “something new to consider.” Indeed it was; she knows me well.

The story is titled “I was forced to be pregnant.” With a title like that, reading it was actually not on the top of my to read list. I thought it was about women not exercising their right to choice. I was very, very wrong on that one.

Have you ever heard of Reproductive coercion? It is a term that was quite recently coined by the advocates against domestic violence to describe a certain type of abuse some women face. It occurs when a man pressures their partner to have kids and/or impregnates them against their will. Reproductive coercion comes in three different types:
1. Emotional pressure that turns into verbal and physical abuse.
2. Sabotaging birth control
3. Marital rape
Over 75% of women 19-49 who reported once experiencing domestic violence also endured some type of reproductive control by men. It’s all about control and domination over a woman’s body.

The first story in the magazine is about a woman who got married around 36 years of age. After a few months of dating her boyfriend talked excitedly about having children. After he proposed he began calling her “The Babymaker.” She then confided with him that one of her fallopian tubes was blocked. He in return insisted she see a fertility doctor. She recounts, “I had finally met a great guy who was eager to start a family with me. What woman wouldn’t fall for that?” Soon after her honeymoon he persisted on in an obsessive manner, but his efforts had to be temporarily halted as she had to get emergency back surgery. Alas, 6 months into recovery he was back to pressuring her again. She was in much pain at the time due to her back, but she agreed to In Vitro Fertilization. She then became pregnant, but soon miscarried. In response, her husband grabbed her by the neck, choking her. He apologized, blaming his outburst on his grief and had her sign up for another round of IVF. And then a third round. She tried to put him off with the excuse that she needed to weigh more before she could take treatments, her husband forced her to get on the scale often and filled the fridge with fattening foods. “It hurt that all I was good for was getting pregnant.” She recounts. At the end, he screamed at her, threatening to replace her with a maid if she couldn’t get pregnant and she told him she no longer wanted to have his child. He destroyed bedroom furniture, pushed her down the stairs and threatened her with a gun. She fled to a domestic violence shelter.

The second story was about a woman who faced marital rape. This woman was 40, had a then boyfriend and two children from a previous marriage. After telling her boyfriend she did not want any more children, her boyfriend refused to wear a condom and began to rape her.  She then became pregnant with her third child. Birth control was never an option for her because she couldn’t hide pills anywhere for he went through all of her belongings. Three months after giving birth, he raped her again, impregnating her with twins. She lost the twins in a physical fight with him, but soon became pregnant again. During her recovery she begged her obstetrician to remove her ovaries and devise a lie to tell him; that she had cancer. After a decade of sexual abuse and violence she was able to get a job that kept her out of the house and often times traveling.

One in four callers to the National Domestic Abuse hotline said that their partners had tried to force them to become pregnant. Why? As one woman stated, “Its like he wants to own me from the inside out.”  Having a baby is the perfect tie that binds. These type of abusers want to create a circumstance in which their partner is dependent on him.


Many voters never consider how defunding these clinics could hurt victims of domestic violence who turn to them for counseling as well as pregnancy prevention. Abused women will turn to health care providers long before they will turn to domestic abuse hotlines and organizations. Many women in abusive relationships rely on life saving, affordable care programs such as Title X. It is critical that such places are open and operation when women and children need them so desperately.

holy fuck im crying.

I know I’ve told this story before, but my abusive ex refused to let me take birth control.  I was on the pill until he found them in my purse. 

I went to the Student Health Center—they were completely unhelpful, choosing to lecture me about the importance of safe sex (recommending condoms) instead of actually listening to my problem.

Then I went to Planned Parenthood. The Nurse Practitioner took one look at my fading bruises and stopped the exam. She called in the doctor. The doctor came in and simply asked me: “Are you ready to leave him?” When I denied that I was being abused, she didn’t argue with me. She just asked me what I needed. I said I need a birth control method that my boyfriend couldn’t detect. She recommended a few options and we decided on Depo. 

When I told her that my boyfriend read my emails and listened to my phone messages and was known to follow me, she suggested to do the Depo injections at off hours when the clinic was normally closed. She made a note in my chart and instructed the front desk never to leave messages for me—instead, she programmed her personal cell phone number into my phone under the name “Nora”. She told me she would call me to schedule my appointments; she wouldn’t leave a message, but I should call her back when I was able to.

And that was it. No judgment. No lecture. She walked me to the door and told me to call her day or night if I needed anything. That she lived 5 blocks from campus and would come get me. That I wasn’t alone. That she just wanted me to be safe.

I never called her to come to my rescue. But I have no doubt that she would have come if I had called. She kept me on Depo for a year, giving me those monthly injections in secret, helping me prevent a desperately unwanted pregnancy. 

I cannot thank Planned Parenthood enough for the work they do.

(via nextmorgothidol)


this is how rape culture feels

when it’s dark
and late
and i’m walking alone
my body is 
whirring in time with my frantic heartbeat
and in my mind
the news broadcaster is telling me that
one in three women will be a
of sexual assault in their lifetime -
well, i went out with two other girls tonight
so which one does that make me?

arms crossed
head down
walk fast
no streetlights?
cross the street
keys between fingers
cell phone in hand
it’s so hard to move quickly
in such a goddamn tight dress. 

numbers, figures, stories - 
they roll off your tongue in conversation 
and you sometimes forget that 
a third of women
will have something fucked from inside them,
adam cracking eve’s chest to pluck an excess rib for himself
taken just because he could 
just to store away and rub and polish

this feeling is the kind of unclean 
that no amount of showers can fix. 

and then,
the questions -
why were you walking alone?
why didn’t you catch a cab?
why were you dressed the way you were dressed?
why didn’t you scream?
why didn’t you run?
why didn’t you fight?
and as you feel your tongue recoil with the hot blast of shame, you think -
why don’t you ask 
why they burnt a part of me to the ground
and spat 
on the ashes?

you don’t have to tell us
that not all men are 
“like that” -
we have fathers, brothers, male lovers too
but statistically,
more of you are 
“like that”
than you care to admit
and sometimes, we do not know if we are stepping into
dante’s inferno
grandmother’s cottage
until we are well and truly through the door

if you can try and feel me up 
in a crowded train at peak hour
i shudder to think what you would do
had you come across me walking home alone

if you claim that you are “neutral”
when it comes to rape culture -
that men shouldn’t rape
but women shouldn’t dress like sluts
and yes, rape is wrong, but what if it’s a misunderstanding -
then you are as far away from neutral
as i want to be from you
neutrality is something
that you can feel 
when someone asks,
“do you like glee?”
“would you like some more cake?”
it is not, however
an appropriate response
- a humane response -
to the questions of
“do you think people ever ask to be raped?”
“if they didn’t say no, that means it’s ok, right?”
your silence
your “neutrality”
is as hurtful as the hands 
that so many women have been 
invaded by
held down by
pushed up a fence, fingers in mouth, torn apart by

no, i’m not interested in giving you my number.
i hope you understand. 

(via jadelyn)


[TW: Rape]






Trigger Warning: Rape, Racism, hate crimes, cyber bullying, violence, etc

The pictures aren’t clear enough so I decided a photo set would make them clearer for future reference. 

For everyone wanting to help report this guy, you can do so at this link

Simply copy and paste the following wall of text into the message box and get this song of a bitch thrown out of his internship.

Hello, I am writing to inform you that a recent intern that you have taken up on your show, “Adrifted” [ ] has been sending extremely hateful, racist, and threatening messages to others. These messages include threats of rape and murder, which can be found in the following link:

In which he states “answer my 2 questions bitch about raping you and your people i love watching your culture burn out of history. your in a country that doesn’t give a shit either way to go sellout now answer my fucking questions”

The questions he is referring to are included in the following screenshot:

The complete transcript is as follows:

“i would rape you like seriously stalk you and rape you and make you scream all type of jihad nonsense as i sodomized you and came all over your clothing, defaming your culture. and then i would go home and watch soldiers raping palestinians and just laugh at the irony. your only 18, your in for hell when you get older. you will get raped out of pure spite and you will always remember this text”

“all your people should be mass raped and exterminated from this earth. in due time”

“answer my txts before i kill u”

Not only did he refer back to these messages in the post which I provided in the first screenshot, but his IP address has also been logged and tied to all 4 messages, which can be seen in the following screenshots:

As you can see, his IP Address [ ] matches up with the times those messages were received.

I am asking NBC to reconsider allowing such a violent and hateful individual on the network, as it reflects poorly on your image as a network that is often hosting individuals who have dedicated themselves to the complete opposite, and spreading messages of love and tolerance, and I don’t believe that you would like to be known as the network sponsoring individuals who openly make racist, sexist, violent and misogynistic threats towards others.

This information is being spread across the internet, and we are all demanding that NBC take action against this individual as we continue to seek that legal actions are taken against him.

Thank you, and I look forward to your response.

Please spread this like wildfire and make sure this asshole gets what’s coming for him

that site has many links. whats the best one to click?

I neglected to mention, he’s currently interning with 30 Rock, so that would be the link to send the mail to.

Keep her in your prayers. This is absolutely not okay. Let’s hope that justice is served inshAllah. I’ve dealt with my own series of Anonymous hate mail and it is not something that should be taken lightly. The media should get involved if nothing is done to take care of this matter. Cyber-bullying is a serious matter and sometimes comes with detrimental effects. 

He’s deleted his account, apparently.

(via occupiedmuslim)


“ahahah ha hahahahaha you got raped” he yelled to the female rape victim whose character he just killed in a game while she was looking the other way for two seconds 

she was triggered but she needs to grow a thicker skin bc it’s just a word !!!!!


School District: 12-Year-Old “Was Herself Responsible” For Being Raped‏



“She was herself responsible,” the district and three other defendants’ attorneys wrote in a Oct. 24 legal filing. “Carelessness and negligence on her part proximately contributed to the happenings of the incident.”

Please, click here to sign now!

This is a 12-year-old girl we’re talking about here. A scared little girl molested by a man she thought she could trust, now a young woman being told that this teacher’s advances were her “responsibility” to deflect.

Please, join us in writing the Moraga school district and its legal team to express your horror and disgust at their attack on Kristen Cunnane. If we can bring enough media attention to this story, we can stop this appalling victim-blaming once and for all — but if we don’t speak out, more women and girls will be shamed into silence.

PETITION TO MORAGA SCHOOL DISTRICT: Blaming pre-teen victims for the actions of their molesters is nothing short of horrific. We demand that you stop the assault on Kristen Cunnane and her fellow survivors, taking responsibility for your failure to protect them from predatory teachers.


(via nextmorgothidol)