Retrograde Waters

Hello. I'm Rose, 20-something Nebraskan. If you want to know more feel free to ask, I'm not going to waste space here.
This is a personal blog that serves as a miscellaneous collection of things I find cute, cool, interesting, and enraging.
I know that all people are equal and deserve the same rights and respect, and I welcome everyone of all and any race, religion, nationality, gender, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity and expression, romantic orientation, age, ability, anything else I may have forgotten (let me know!) and any combination or absence thereof. I do NOT welcome discrimination and bigotry. If *I* say or do anything that is offensive or insensitive, please tell me! I try to consider everyone/different perspectives and experiences when speaking, but I could always make a mistake, and educating myself is a constant process: I will be grateful rather than offended to have small-mindedness on my part pointed out. It's the only way I'll know to correct it.
Thank you and have a nice day!
(Blog NSFW: strong language, various topics of discussion, and occasional images of anatomy and/or nudity.)
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Posts tagged "sexism"

This week we have two great questions from readers on our tumblr about misogyny in slash fandom and the sidelining of female characters. Writes one reader, “I understand slash is about a male relationship, but the female characters that are important for the show’s dynamics or just have a close connection to the male characters (sister, best friend, etc) are sidelined to an outrageous degree. When they are given more of a central role to the plot, they seem to be turned into one dimensional or just bitchy people, no matter how great they are on the show.” Another asks, “Could you discuss the problem of sexism/misogyny/general (mis)treatment of women within some parts of the slash culture?”

I care a lot about this topic. I think fandom makes it all too easy to hate female characters from the moment we set foot in it by teaching us immediately to devalue Mary Sues (self-insert fics where an original female character is the most specialist character of all!) and elevate male characters and male relationships. When you combine that with the unconscious internalized misogyny of readers and writers, it can be a real problem. Women often get written as competitors, vying for the love of one half of a male/male pairing. Sometimes they’re clingy, catty best friends, or loveless, emotionally frigid partners who can’t give the man what he “deserves” the way another dude can. Often women are slut-shamed and presented as cheaters or as emotionally unfaithful in other ways.

One of the most prominent ways slash fandom marginalizes women is by including them but making their characters all about the men. This is a pet peeve of mine because often a writer will do this, and the women will be written in a way that’s witty and funny, and they’ll receive all sorts or praise for it. But the thing is, if your female characters are only in a scene to comment on the progress of the male relationship, ask/advise a man about his relationship, or to be stand-ins for the audience as we flail over how adorable X/Y are together? That’s still marginalization because you’re writing female characters who are only there to amplify male experience.

Another common criticism of slash fandom is that we like to pair off female characters who “threaten” our slash ships. I think that’s a mixed criticism; it can be true, but on the other hand, in the case of, say, Gwen and Merlin from Merlin, lots of fans genuinely love Gwen and Morgana together and enjoy reading about them. If they also enjoy reading about Merlin and Arthur together, it shouldn’t mean that Gwen/Morgana is an inferior ship by default. The issue, to me, is not that female characters often have to serve a narrative that’s about getting two male characters together; it’s how they serve the narrative. So in the Naruto fanfic featured this week, Sakura could have been written as an unfulfilled housewife totally ruined by Sasuke’s emotional issues; instead she was someone in a nonfunctional marriage who was totally blindsided by the prospect of love in another place. She had her own story. And we got to see that story. That’s really all it takes to elevate your female character from window dressing to 3-d character with agency and complexity.

As women writing slash, it feels to me like we spend more time trying to get into the heads of the male characters we write about than we do the real women around us, much less female characters. One of the most common arguments for why girls in slash fandom don’t write more about girls is that there just aren’t as many strong, well-developed female characters to work with. Having now comfortably resided in Inception fandom for two years, where fans have generated thousands of fics around a couple (Arthur and Eames) with less than 5 minutes of total screen time together, this seems more and more like a flimsy excuse. Writing about girls is fun. Sometimes we just have to remind ourselves how fun it can be, by making the choice to include them in ways that give them choice and complexity, that don’t just prop up the dudes.s

fozmeadows:

lacigreen:

there isn’t one.  at least not one that is equivalent.  names like “manwhore” hold nowhere near the same amount of disgust, degradation, or social consequences.  slut shame is sexism.

Note also that there’s no equivalent female version of stud - that is, a positive term for a woman who has a lot of sexual partners and/or plays the field. Back in high school, an ex and his friends wanted to compliment me for having hooked up with a few different people - a noteworthy feat in their books - and settled on calling me a maniser (instead of womaniser) because they literally had no access to an existing, complimentary term.

fozmeadows:

lacigreen:

there isn’t one.  at least not one that is equivalent.  names like “manwhore” hold nowhere near the same amount of disgust, degradation, or social consequences.  slut shame is sexism.

Note also that there’s no equivalent female version of stud - that is, a positive term for a woman who has a lot of sexual partners and/or plays the field. Back in high school, an ex and his friends wanted to compliment me for having hooked up with a few different people - a noteworthy feat in their books - and settled on calling me a maniser (instead of womaniser) because they literally had no access to an existing, complimentary term.

(via thatfeministqueer)

highlighteretcigarettes:

regala-electra:

destronomics:

firelordazula:

greenscrewdriver:



urlgrayhot:



strbrryseason:



01. because women can’t like action or science fiction without there being any ~female~ things tied into it.



I hate the reboot. I do. I love it for some reasons but I hate it. Arg I really can’t. 



OUCH WOW WHAT FUCKING YEAR DO YOU THINK THIS IS LINDELOF
I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU MAN
~LOL HOW DO WE WOMEN? MAYBE WE SHOULD BABBY. YES BABBY GOOD IDEA, BRING WOMEN. ALL WOMEN BABBY. WOMEN DoN’T STORY OR CHARACTERS THAT IS FOR MANS. YES GOOD JOb WELL DONE MANS.
AND THIS WAS FIVE MINUTES INTO THE FIRST MEETING?
GENE AND MAJEL OUGHT TO COME THE FUCK BACK AND SLAP YOU ALL




….lmao is this a real thing
i really don’t understand where this myth that women don’t enjoy star trek came from? like, what sort of cave of delusion do you live in
who do you think dressed up for cons and published zines and drew fanart and wrote all the fanfiction and coined the term slash back when star trek was not a franchise but a little-watched sixties TV series that was cancelled after three seasons
we helped keep this thing going and we’ve been here all along, you’re just not looking

It’s been ages now, but I was an intern at a magazine when Star Trek (2009) was doing its press tour. I transcribed a similar quote from Lindelof, and in the process lost it very, very quietly in my cube. Then made my way to the reporter’s office, closed the door, and lost it loudly. 
I mean, ffs. Who does he think SAVED THE SHOW? Who crafted one of the first successful letter writing campaigned? Who organized one of the first, legitimately successful TV Show-Specific cons? People who had a lot of time on their hands (in part by many of them being stay-at-home moms), and a lot of energy, and a lot of enthusiasm? Women.
Star Trek simply wouldn’t exist, much less exist as a property highly dependent on the enthusiasm of a small number of fans with highly soluble wallets — hell, modern fandom as we know it wouldn’t exist (we pre-date Star Wars after all) if it wasn’t for the geek culture women pioneered and crafted.
And him being so blind? And so dismissive at, well, frankly, the people that make his entire career, much less this specific job, possible? Man, I’m angry all over again.

Yo men, your beloved Star Trek got put on the air thanks to the efforts of a major TV powerhouse. AKA Lucille Ball. A LADY. Sit your asses down.

TBH as a woman who loves Star Trek in general, I remember the first few minutes of this movie as… a little awkward? Sorry I don’t like watching birth when I wanna watch Star Trek.

highlighteretcigarettes:

regala-electra:

destronomics:

firelordazula:

greenscrewdriver:

urlgrayhot:

strbrryseason:

01. because women can’t like action or science fiction
without there being any ~female~ things tied into it.

I hate the reboot. I do. I love it for some reasons but I hate it. Arg I really can’t. 

OUCH WOW WHAT FUCKING YEAR DO YOU THINK THIS IS LINDELOF

I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU MAN

~LOL HOW DO WE WOMEN? MAYBE WE SHOULD BABBY. YES BABBY GOOD IDEA, BRING WOMEN. ALL WOMEN BABBY. WOMEN DoN’T STORY OR CHARACTERS THAT IS FOR MANS. YES GOOD JOb WELL DONE MANS.

AND THIS WAS FIVE MINUTES INTO THE FIRST MEETING?

GENE AND MAJEL OUGHT TO COME THE FUCK BACK AND SLAP YOU ALL

image

….lmao is this a real thing

i really don’t understand where this myth that women don’t enjoy star trek came from? like, what sort of cave of delusion do you live in

who do you think dressed up for cons and published zines and drew fanart and wrote all the fanfiction and coined the term slash back when star trek was not a franchise but a little-watched sixties TV series that was cancelled after three seasons

we helped keep this thing going and we’ve been here all along, you’re just not looking

It’s been ages now, but I was an intern at a magazine when Star Trek (2009) was doing its press tour. I transcribed a similar quote from Lindelof, and in the process lost it very, very quietly in my cube. Then made my way to the reporter’s office, closed the door, and lost it loudly. 

I mean, ffs. Who does he think SAVED THE SHOW? Who crafted one of the first successful letter writing campaigned? Who organized one of the first, legitimately successful TV Show-Specific cons? People who had a lot of time on their hands (in part by many of them being stay-at-home moms), and a lot of energy, and a lot of enthusiasm? Women.

Star Trek simply wouldn’t exist, much less exist as a property highly dependent on the enthusiasm of a small number of fans with highly soluble wallets — hell, modern fandom as we know it wouldn’t exist (we pre-date Star Wars after all) if it wasn’t for the geek culture women pioneered and crafted.

And him being so blind? And so dismissive at, well, frankly, the people that make his entire career, much less this specific job, possible? Man, I’m angry all over again.

Yo men, your beloved Star Trek got put on the air thanks to the efforts of a major TV powerhouse. AKA Lucille Ball. A LADY. Sit your asses down.

TBH as a woman who loves Star Trek in general, I remember the first few minutes of this movie as… a little awkward? Sorry I don’t like watching birth when I wanna watch Star Trek.

(via emptyness203-deactivated2013081)

Fake Geek Girls (x)

(via jadelyn)

omgoswin:

kylesbogusjourney:

Female privilege is getting to claim a headache to avoid sex.

Female oppression is having to claim physical illness to avoid sex because men won’t take a simple fucking “no” for an answer.

Female oppression is men being so entitled that they think being denied sex is oppressive.

(via anotherfeminist)

jadelyn:

daintyblackpegasus:

sourcedumal:

laurondo:

sourcedumal:

Naw. You ain’t changed one bit.

All you doing now is enacting a different form of sexism on your daughter.

Because now she is going to be subject to the same sexist bullshit that you enacted on god knows how many women that came into your life before your wife gave birth, including your own fuckin wife.

And now, your ‘property’ is subject to that shit.

And now, you’re not going to start advocating for some humane treatment of women.

Y’all asses ain’t going out to speak against rape culture and cat calling. Y’all ain’t checkin y’all boys, who women are often tellin that they’re ‘creepy as fuck’ and they don’t feel safe around to you.

Naw.

Instead you lock down on her and tell her it’s her fuckin fault if shit happened because how dare she not do as her big protective daddy say.

Bye with that mess.

Because you know exactly how a father raises his daughter, yes. You know exactly what it is he says to her in order to protect her from certain men who think women are their property. You know that he tells his daughter it’s her fault she’s raped because how dare she not listen to what he had to say. Makes sense to me.

Maybe some guys say they change once they have a daughter but don’t, but not all of them are this way. Good job putting down the ones that actually change for the better by calling them all liars.

*eyeroll*

If it takes till you have a kid to see women as human, it’s too fuckin late for you. Plain and simple.

And I’ll side eye the fuck out of these dudes if I damn well please.

If it takes till you have a kid to see women as human, it’s too fuckin late for you. Plain and simple.

If it takes till you have a kid to see women as human, it’s too fuckin late for you. Plain and simple.

If it takes till you have a kid to see women as human, it’s too fuckin late for you. Plain and simple.

If it takes till you have a kid to see women as human, it’s too fuckin late for you. Plain and simple.

CAN WE REPEAT THAT UNTIL THE END OF FUCKING TIME BECAUSE HOLY SHIT

it’s not even about her being a woman, it’s about how that reflects on you! 

“no daughter of mine will be subjected to that”

motherfucker, but someone else’s daughter can? the fact that she’s loved and treasured by someone else means nothing? the fact that she’s to be loved and treasured regardless because she deserves it on general principle means nothing? why? because of how she dresses? what she says? how she acts? but once it’s YOUR sister, daughter, mother, all of a sudden, it’s nuanced, it’s different because it’s not about her womanhood, it’s about YOU?

how fucking egotistical and sickening

Carving out an exemption from your misogyny for a girl or woman you feel particularly affectionate toward isn’t the same thing as a feminist awakening.  I see it all the time with my dad - in the same breath, even.  His daughter can conquer the world, do anything, stand toe-to-toe with any man on the planet and come out on top.  But women shouldn’t be in the military, shouldn’t try to compete in male-dominated industries, only rarely are worthy of achieving political prominence, etc.  My father, and men like him, see two groups: women, and female family members.  FFMs aren’t *women*, to them.  We’re different, special, apart from it.  Thus, he can continue to be a total sexist shithead, because it’s not directed at his FFMs, it’s directed at women, and that’s different.

Cognitive dissonance is a hell of a phenomenon.

deadlydinos:

letsfuckingcuddleok:

nothingsgoingtochange:

Someone give this guy a motherfuckin’ certificate.

I reblog every time 

this guy deserves more than a certificate

“In year 7 you were already uncomfortable around me, so I manipulated our teacher into putting us together for a project and when you didn’t want to come to my house, instead of meeting in a neutral place like a library, I did the entire project so that you’d owe me. In year 8 I gave you a bunch of gifts, a really inappropriate quantity, and continued to do so even after you made it abundantly clear that you didn’t want them. By the time the school disco rolled around in year 9, you knew me well enough to know that I wouldn’t take no for an answer, so you made up an excuse and left the whole dance to escape from me, and somehow it’s me and not you who got the worst end of that stick. In year 10, I bought you another grossly inappropriate gift that required you to spend time with me in order to use it, and when you misunderstood how I wanted you to use it I didn’t say anything but just stewed on that information. And now, in year 11, I’m going to publish my victim complex and the entire history of how I’ve stalked you over the past five years, comfortable in the knowledge that because I’m a man, I will be taken seriously and you’ll be vilified.”

She has every right to think boys are dicks. Here’s example number one. This post is really really gross. He shouldn’t get a certificate; he needs to get a restraining order.

Just imagine a girl or woman doing and saying exactly the same thing.

Nobody would question the inappropriateness of her actions. She would be called crazy, creepy, clingy, etc. Maybe, if she’s really, really lucky, she’d be pitied for being desperate and/or handicapped.

Men get to be Nice Guys. Women are obsessive psychos.

(via jadelyn)

stfusexists:

stfuprolife:

prolifehypocrisy:

antichoicescreencraps:

An anti-choice graphic.

Congratulations. This may just be the weirdest one I have ever seen.
As usual, note the imagery of a woman as an empty shell and a embyro as a fully formed infant.
And not so usual is… everything else.

Gotta love it when “pro-lifers” show off how they really see people who have the ability to get pregnant, especially women.

Hey, remember this from yesterday? This picture is eerily similar, and the common thread is, “Women aren’t people, they are objects that we can disassemble at will.”
I like to draw parallels on this blog as much as I can, because I really think one of the best ways to recognize and combat sexism is to see with our own eyes that there are patterns and themes to this sexism. Rarely do I get two examples that are so similar within a day of each other, but here they are. And it’s not a coincidence that people who want to deny women and everyone else with a uterus a say in their own body and the people who are all too happy to pick which half of a woman in the bikini they would rather have sex with use the same images: they’re a part of the same structure and culture of disrespect that allows sexism to thrive in our society.

stfusexists:

stfuprolife:

prolifehypocrisy:

antichoicescreencraps:

An anti-choice graphic.

Congratulations. This may just be the weirdest one I have ever seen.

As usual, note the imagery of a woman as an empty shell and a embyro as a fully formed infant.

And not so usual is… everything else.

Gotta love it when “pro-lifers” show off how they really see people who have the ability to get pregnant, especially women.

Hey, remember this from yesterday? This picture is eerily similar, and the common thread is, “Women aren’t people, they are objects that we can disassemble at will.”

I like to draw parallels on this blog as much as I can, because I really think one of the best ways to recognize and combat sexism is to see with our own eyes that there are patterns and themes to this sexism. Rarely do I get two examples that are so similar within a day of each other, but here they are. And it’s not a coincidence that people who want to deny women and everyone else with a uterus a say in their own body and the people who are all too happy to pick which half of a woman in the bikini they would rather have sex with use the same images: they’re a part of the same structure and culture of disrespect that allows sexism to thrive in our society.

(via anotherfeminist)

I’m getting real tired of how many racist lies I was fed kindergarten onwards. I wasn’t taught history, I was taught white supremacy in the guise of keeping things soft and fuzzy to protect children’s innocence.

Turns out most activists lauded as heroes were, you know, activists rather than perfect little saints repackaged for mainstream sensitivities, and oh hey, inequality is still a thing. And white men who absolutely were not gay didn’t invent everything. Women did things. Non-white people did things (after the birth of Christ, even!). LGBT people exist. We didn’t have Thanksgiving, we committed several hundred years of genocide. Things are “tense” in the Middle East because we keep fucking them over. (Would it kill people to teach USA history after 1960?) And on, and on, and on! I was hardly taught anything, and what I was taught was at best half the picture with lots of propagandist embellishments.

I mean yeah, shit is complicated and you don’t feel comfortable telling kids all the gory details, but for fuck’s sake TELL THEM THE TRUTH. None of this “we were a little bit mean once upon a time but it’s all good now” bullshit.

jadelyn:

this ain’t livin’: Stop Expecting Free Work from Women

The fact that people still think women’s work is worthless is infuriating, and it’s especially so in supposedly egalitarian movements. When people express irritation and anger at women who ask for credit, who ask to be compensated, there’s a serious problem with your social movement. Women working for the cause may choose to donate some or all of their time, but they shouldn’t be forced into it, nor should there be an expectation that they should do so; to the contrary, they should have to actively turn down compensation rather than volunteering to go without.

I highly recommend you read the whole thing under the link. It won’t take much time, it’s not terribly long, but it’s well worth the read.